07.07.04

11:14 p.m.

I need to prioritize better

I am so stressed right now; I feel like crying. Tomorrow is my bankruptcy hearing. My lawyer called tonight at 9:30pm and asked if I had any questions. I said no. He reminded me to bring my social security card and driverís license. Without a second thought, I said I would. I double checked after I hung up with him, and noticed my social security card has gone AWOL. Iíve been in a frantic state since. I have literally torn my house apart looking for it. The thing that really irritates me Ė Iím so anal retentive about everything else. My CDs, books, even my fucking debit cards are in alphabetical order. My clothes are arranged by color and length. My facial cleansers/moisturizers have to have the labels facing out and be in order of use. How can I be so fucking nit picky about stupid things, and lose the most important document I own?

Have you ever been so overwhelmed that the tiniest thing just drives you over the edge; when you just want to sit in the corner and cry? Maybe thatís just me.

Iím sorry, I canít even think straight right now, let alone write a cohesive entry.

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