11:17 a.m.


So, I've been really sick lately. I think I said something about waking up to blood all over and figuring out it came from my throat.

Well, I went to work on Friday and they forced me to go to the doctor. I have strep throat and bronchitis. So, I started Penicillin and she said my fever should break and I wouldn't be contagious anymore after 24-48 hours.

Well, my fever didn't break, it got worse. And, I started feeling worse. And, I got this weird rash on my arms. So, I decided to go back to the doctor yesterday because I really was feeling like shit.

Unfortunately, my doctor wasn't available so I had to see another one. She sucked. She did a rapid strep test again, and of course it came back negative cause, duh, I'm on antibiotics. My tonsils are still the size of golf balls. She said it was probably just a viral infection of some sort. She ordered a CBC and a Mono test. I don't have mono, I get the results of the CBC today, though really, it's not gonna tell me what the fuck is wrong with me.

I still have a temp of 102, I still feel dizzy and naseaous. My throat is still sore beyond belief and now I have some funky rash on both of my arms. She didn't even look at it.

Anyway, I thought she'd give me stronger antibiotics or something. I've never had strep throat before in my life. Ever. And my brother had it so much that he had to have his tonsils removed, so it's not like I wasn't exposed. The doctors used to think I was immune or something. I think it's odd that I got it now, though maybe I'm just over reacting. I just feel like shit, and after the whole flesh eating strep strain that my father had, I don't really like that I have any type of strep infection.

I just want to feel better. I have an exam next week, I haven't done any homework for that class, and my grades are going to slip even further.

I hate myself for getting sick. I hate that my grades are going to be so bad this semester. I hate that this is by far the worst school year ever, not only academically, but just life wise.

My best friend that I secretly loved dumped me completely for a new girlfriend. So, the person I depended on everyday to keep me sane now speaks to me less than once a week. I've been hospitalized. I've had an ovary ripped out. Christmas was the worst Christmas ever. I met a wonderful boy and then he left and I found out he was engaged the entire time. I met a very cute boy who wants me to change his diapers. I have been so sick that my throat bleeds. And, I'm just sick of life right now.

I'll quit whining. I think it's the fever talking anyway.

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