12:28 a.m.

happy friggin' new year

So, itís been awhile. Sorry about that. Letís just forgive and forget.

The wonderful things that have happened to me in the past week and a half:

ē I did not get testicles in my stocking. Iím quite depressed about it. I had a brief obsession with Realdolls. I think the selling factor was that her boobies really bounce! Come onÖ.thatís just freaky. (Thank you very much to whoever left me that nice link.)

ē Figured out I have eczema, and itís nasty. Thank God for my Mexico drug smuggling granny.

ē I successfully had not one, not two, but three periods in one month. I think Iím dying. Honest.

ē I want these for no other reason than to say I own a pair.

ē I somehow, in the middle of the night, bruised the top of my foot beyond belief, and now it hurts to walk.

ē I finally have come to the realization that I live in the ghetto. The big tip-off? I saw one of my cracked out neighbors vacuuming his sidewalk yesterday. Complete with a bright orange extension cord coming from his house.

ē My grandmother in Germany died. I didnít know her well, but now Iíll never have the opportunity.

ē I got into an accident tonight that caused me to split open my lip because some asshole from Texas canít drive in the snow.

So, yes, this year has started off peachy.

Only 360 days until 2006.

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