1:54 a.m.

girl rant

Warning: The following contains references to my uterus. Boys are excused from class for the day.

Iím on an emotional roller coaster.
Iíve been called manic.

And thatís just been in the last 48 hours.

Iíve come to hate my uterus. Its obligatory childbearing purpose is overshadowed by its pain in the ass (not to mention the back, abdomen, head and breasts) side effects.

Iíve apparently pissed it off in the past few years. It was deprived of its torturous ways when I was on the birth control shot, and Iím pretty sure it knows I have no plans of using it for its intended purpose.

Itís payback time for Julie.

Since Iíve been off the shot, thereís anywhere between 10 and 19 days before I start bleeding again.

So, yes. I am manic, psychotic, crazy, bitchy, and emotional. Thereís a 72 hour window when Iím myself; when there isnít some kind of hormonal imbalance. Today isnít one of those days.

Had it not been for the weight gain and loss of sex drive, Iíd still be menstruation free and happy on Depo.

Now, Iíve got to figure out what to do about this situation.

ē Go back on Depo, gain weight, bleed for 3 months straight, shell out $70 dollars every three months, lose any interest in sex in twelve months, but be Tampax free forever.

ē Get the patch, gain weight, bleed every 28 days, shell out $30 a month, be a slave to the Tampax company for the rest of my life.

ē Get on the Pill, gain weight, bleed every 28 days, shell out $20 a month, be a slave to the Tampax company for the rest of my life, have the possibility of pregnancy (if I ever have sex again) because my talent for taking pills regularly leaves something to be desired.

ē Do nothing, stay the same weight, bleed sporadically, pay nothing except the price of my sanity, own stock in the Tampax company, easily become pregnant (if I ever have sex again), and alienate everyone around me.

Any suggestions?

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