05.26.04
7:40 p.m.
College here I come...
I've been neglectful. I've been negligent. I've been thoughtless, insensitive, and uncaring of your needs. I'm sorry.Ok, now that we've cleared that up, I can get on with the gossip. J and I have officially called it quits. I haven't spoken with or seen him since June of 2003. As I look back at old entries, I really don't feel reminiscent or nostalgic. Honestly, I think, "What the hell was I thinking?" I pined over him and there was absolutely no reason for it. Granted, I was with him for a very long time, but we were just two different people, and we had to go our separate ways. It wasn't meant to last, and I'm thankful for that now.
So, no more mention of J from now on...we can all breathe big sighs of relief. *sigh*
As for more exciting things... I'm still working as a vet assistant. I still love the job, still hate the pay. My lack of a sufficient cash flow has prompted me to do something I should've done 7 years ago...I'm going to college. I'm probably going to be the oldest freshman in the history of the university, but I figure I�ll make a good grandmotherly figure. I'm majoring in mechanical engineering (I know...it's a "boy thing", but this "boy thing" will make me a rich girl). Engineering seems to run in the family, so I thought I�d give it a whirl.
Starting school again has been a long and drawn out process. It started in March of this year, and the whole entrance process hasn't been completed yet. I had to take my ACT, and believe me after 7 years of no schoolwork, it was a feat. I scored a 32, which is pretty damn good if I do say so myself. I was quite pleased with my ability to retain most of the things I learned in high school. Now, I�m afraid that I�ve set myself up for failure. Sure, passing a test isn�t hard, but can I actually pass a class? I�ve never had to study a day in my life, and I know I�m not going to be able to breeze through college like I did through high school. Not that I actually breezed through high school...quite the opposite, I kinda breezed my way right out of it in my junior year never to return. But, what�s the point in crying over spilled milk?
The financial aid aspect of college has proven to be the most arduous and annoying part of the application process. Apparently, an income of $15,800 is way too much, and I should just retire now. According to the government�s calculations, I can pretty much pay for college myself. I was given, and I shit you not, a $200 grant. That�s it. Nothing else. $200. Period. I think a chapter in one of the textbooks cost more than $200. I have since filed an appeal, and am currently waiting to hear back. The financial aid officer was actually quite helpful, and gave me a little hope that my college years wouldn�t all be like this. Apparently, I didn�t meet the priority date to be admitted, and that�s why I�m not getting much assistance, that and I�m rich of course. She told me to file an appeal stating when I start classes, my income will drop significantly. Not that it can get much lower than it is now, but she said if I had made $800 less, I would�ve qualified for over $5000 in grants alone. Hmm...I'm going to be doing a lot of math, and this doesn't seem to add up right. I just can�t figure out our government sometimes.
Anywho, I should be going. I�ve missed you all, and I promise I�ll be back soon.
