2:05 a.m.


I haven't decided if I should move all my old entries from my other diary to here. I'm thinking it would be too damn much work, but I feel this inexplicable loyalty and attachment to it. It has been a part of me for so long. It feels like I'm dumping a good old friend for a shiny new one. Damn guilt. I feel guilty about everything. I feel guilty when a bug hits my windshield damn it. How pathetic am I? OK. So maybe I'll just let my old diary rest in peace (or pieces). I must admit, this is quite a lot more convient. With geocities I had to start up a whole program everytime, then rewrite the HTML every entry. Which is why it looks so thrown together, not to mention never updated.

OK, enough of that talk. Let's concentrate on me. (am I a little self centered? you bet!) I have today and tomorrow off, which normally means J comes over for a little sex romp, and conversation. Usually the other way around. I called him around 2:00pm today, and he imformed me that he had to go golfing with his buddy early in the morning, and couldn't come over. Hmmm..have to go golfing? Gun pointed at head? I think not. Second, I think I'm the only girl in her 20's who has a problem with this situation. I mean...come on...golf??!? I swear, I don't understand it. He isn't rich, he isn't snobby...yes, he's white, but none-the-less he isn't 50. Boys. Gotta love 'em, need to strangle them.

So, an independent 22 year-old girl is now sitting at home alone, because she can't find anyone to go out with. When you limit your friends to people who are actually worth hanging out with, you come up a little short on people. Maybe I shouldnt be so picky. I'm a little too introverted I suppose. My best friend still doesn't know everything about me, and we've known each other for 13 years! In fact, anyone who has read my diary knows more about me than she does. It's quite sad really, but she isn't really trust worthy with secrets. I'll explain another time. nighty-night. I must sleep, I need all the beauty I can muster.

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