11.22.07
12:23 a.m.
Secrets are like snowflakes that melt into your memory
It's been over a year since I've heard Sam's voice.We've exchanged emails and instant messages, but that's all.
Even those are becoming sparse. And it's killing me because I still love him. I still love him just as much as I did over a year ago. And it's just so disheartening to come to the conclusion that even though he says he loves me, it can't possibly be true.
And I've known this for a long time. I wanted so badly to believe that the words he said were true and that he did still love me.
But even I know that if you love someone you don't treat them this way. I'm a secret. His girlfriend hates me and thinks I don't exist in his life anymore.
But he loves me, right?
I'm a fucking joke. My entire life is a fucking joke.
It's just tonight I really need someone to love me, and there is no one.
I don't think there ever will be.