08.21.05
11:42 p.m.
ad nauseam
Classes start tomorrow. It's 11:42pm, and I don't think I'm going to get much, if any, sleep tonight. I'm a ball of nerves. I don't like new things, I don't like change, and I don't particularly like people. I enjoy things I'm familiar with.I know that everything will be fine, and the world will not end tomorrow. I am completely rational - in some ways at least.
It's like I know everything will be ok, but no matter how much I tell myself it will be, I still panic.
I'm such a friggin' hermit. No wonder I think I'll never find someone to love me and want to reproduce with me. I'm AFRAID to meet anyone. Afraid they'll think I'm too fat, or too stupid, or too skinny, or too ugly, or too annoying, etc. ad nauseam...
GAH!
Just kill me now and put me out of my neurotic misery.
