03.31.05

11:33 p.m.

cigarettes repressed my sluttiness

I bet you all thought that I had failed miserably at quitting my nicotine habit and was avoiding posting because I felt guilty.

Well fuck you all for doubting me. I kick ass!

It’s been 10 days, 23 hours and 33 minutes.

I haven’t updated because 1) I wanted to kill everything and everyone and 2) I am so fucking horny it’s unbelievable.

Literally. I can’t stop touching myself.

I’m sure that if more people knew this was a side effect of smoking…well, we’d have a lot more horny, smoke-free people running around.

I think it should be the next anti-tobacco campaign:

“Cigarette or soaking wet? You decide.”

I choose soaking wet.

I think I’ll go lie down now…

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