11.01.04
2:09 p.m.
Mother Nature is a democrat
Today, I woke up to the first snow of the season. And, being the first snow, we had the obligatory freak-out-cancel-everything-close-the-roads mass hysteria. Military bases were on 'essential personnel only' status. Schools across the city were shut down. The interstate was closed in places. Accidents abound.Unfortunately, the institute of higher learning I attend decided we were perfectly safe driving on slightly damp roads. Damn their logical approach to life.
So, I bundled up, warmed up my car, and drove to class with a bunch of maniacs who swerved to miss every falling snowflake.
I sat in class.
Waiting.
When suddenly a woman came in and announced that class had been cancelled.
So, I bundled up, warmed up my car, and drove home with a bunch of maniacs who swerved to miss every falling snowflake.
As I drove home (going top speed at 25 miles per hour) I contemplated tomorrow’s election, and came to the conclusion that Mother Nature is a democrat. Or a Nader supporter.
Follow my logic: Old people hate driving at night, in the rain, and in the snow. Most old people are republican. If there’s a blizzard, old people will stay home. Hence, the democrats will sweep the election. At least here.
That’s my theory, anyway.
