06.16.04

10:32 p.m.

I need a Xanax

I have a dilemma. My orientation for college is Friday. Itís an all day event and itís for entering freshman whoíve never been to college (read: eighteen year-olds). Throughout the day, there are a number of placement exams. The math test has me stressing. Do I study, refresh what I somewhat remember from my high school calculus, and get placed in a class that I have no clue whatís going on? Or, do I not prepare myself and get placed in a class that I can pretty much breeze through?

Iím not worried that Iíll be placed in a remedial math course, I scored a 32 on the math section of the ACT (which I must say, Iím quite proud of considering itís been 8 years). Itís in my DNA to want to do better; Iím compelled to study. Ok, so maybe my fear is that if I donít study Iíll go blank and actually get placed in remedial geometry.

My instincts are conflicting. The logical part of my brain knows I should just answer what I actually know; I need a refresher course anyway. The irrational, obsessive compulsive part of my brain says, ďStudy you moron. You have to get all the questions right.Ē

I worry I worry too much.

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